When are groups going to learn that this (or this, this, this, this, this, this, and this) is just not acceptable to Americans? If you refuse to allow the display of the Stars and Stripes, you are going to look like a schmuck. In spite of our different political opinions, I find very few Americans who object to the flying of the American flag, apartment and condo restrictions be damned.
So why would anyone (or association) try to ban the display of the American flag? Probably because they are on some kind of power trip and get some sort of thrill from it. Almost invariably, any group that has tried to enforce a flag ban has ended up reversing their policy and/or apologizing.
At the beginning of the 1st Persian Gulf War, I remember news reports that the Saudi's didn't want the US flag on the outside of the US soldier's uniforms. So they put it on the inside of their helmets. It wasn't more than a week or so when the American public began to question why the Saudi's would ask us to save their butt's and simultaneously tell us how to dress. Sorry those two don't go together. That policy changed real quick.
I am still amazed that there one to two stories a month of some apartment organization requiring the removal of a flag from some WWII vet. I have been a landlord, and the thought of banning the US flag never occurred to me. Why does it occur to all of these people?
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Taiwan Journey Home
Well, after one day of flying and 4 days in Taiwan it was time to go home. We stopped at the hotel's breakfast buffet one last time and had a light breakfast of fruit and croissants. And then off to the airport we go. Since this was an international flight that passed through two countries, we had to go through security in Taiwan, Japan, and again in Chicago. In a nutshell, Taiwan let me wear my shoes through the screener and I didn't have to take out my laptop. Japan made me take out my laptop, but I still could wear my shoes. Chicago had me take off my shoes and take out my laptop.
In the end, I could have had a couple bottles of liquid explosives in my cargo pants and not one of the airports would have known. Then again, I am not a terrorist although the TSA likes to screen me as one, especially when I am traveling with small kids. In Chicago, the mother and her infant daughter in front of us in line were pulled for screening. Chicago also had the announcements of being at "condition orange" or whatever fancy color they have. Seriously, the get rid of that stupid announcement. What, when the color is yellow or green we don't have to report suspicious activity, but when the color is red or orange we do? Give me a break, your dealing with adults here and in most International airports in the US 75% of the foreign travelers don't have a clue what the color code is, and 99% of the travelers don't pay attention anyway.
The flight to Japan was relatively uneventful. We had a great meal on the plan (Japan Airlines, not American). In the Tokyo airport we had a 4 hour layover. I spent the first hour wandering the airport while my wife slept. I still had 8,000 Yen to spend. I collect coins and bills so spending the large bills helped to break it down into smaller, collectible amounts. Then I came back and woke my wife up so that we could go shopping. Primarily we could candies and treats for the family. Afterwards, we got a bite to eat at one of the cafe's. I have always wondered about the shops that you find in airports. For instance, a Mont Blanc pen shop. Who would buy a $200 pen at the airport? At the electronics shops in Tokyo airport there were video cameras identical to the one that we had, only for twice as much as we paid, and that is after taking into account the 30% discount the store was offering.
We boarded our plane to Chicago, another 777. My wife and I began with our meal and watching "The Tooth Fairy". I like the Rock in non-serious movies. Perhaps it is the dumb jock personna just doesn't come work in serious dramas (or I just don't like serious dramas). Shortly after the movie finished, I closed my eyes for a few minutes, and woke up 6 1/2 hours later. I had just slept longer in an uncomfortable airplane seat than I had in the uncomfortable hotel bed in Taiwan. The flight landed with no incident and we sailed through customs without being shaken down (I didn't even declare the $10,000 cash I had on me - ok, so it was $10,000 Taiwan which is about $350 American).
A short delay for our plane home and we arrived safely. All of our bags made it and none of the gifts were destroyed. I was most worried about the paintings and calligraphy, but my masterful packing had preserved them. I can't wait to go again (although if I can avoid the back to back 10,000 calorie days I'll be happy).
In the end, I could have had a couple bottles of liquid explosives in my cargo pants and not one of the airports would have known. Then again, I am not a terrorist although the TSA likes to screen me as one, especially when I am traveling with small kids. In Chicago, the mother and her infant daughter in front of us in line were pulled for screening. Chicago also had the announcements of being at "condition orange" or whatever fancy color they have. Seriously, the get rid of that stupid announcement. What, when the color is yellow or green we don't have to report suspicious activity, but when the color is red or orange we do? Give me a break, your dealing with adults here and in most International airports in the US 75% of the foreign travelers don't have a clue what the color code is, and 99% of the travelers don't pay attention anyway.
The flight to Japan was relatively uneventful. We had a great meal on the plan (Japan Airlines, not American). In the Tokyo airport we had a 4 hour layover. I spent the first hour wandering the airport while my wife slept. I still had 8,000 Yen to spend. I collect coins and bills so spending the large bills helped to break it down into smaller, collectible amounts. Then I came back and woke my wife up so that we could go shopping. Primarily we could candies and treats for the family. Afterwards, we got a bite to eat at one of the cafe's. I have always wondered about the shops that you find in airports. For instance, a Mont Blanc pen shop. Who would buy a $200 pen at the airport? At the electronics shops in Tokyo airport there were video cameras identical to the one that we had, only for twice as much as we paid, and that is after taking into account the 30% discount the store was offering.
We boarded our plane to Chicago, another 777. My wife and I began with our meal and watching "The Tooth Fairy". I like the Rock in non-serious movies. Perhaps it is the dumb jock personna just doesn't come work in serious dramas (or I just don't like serious dramas). Shortly after the movie finished, I closed my eyes for a few minutes, and woke up 6 1/2 hours later. I had just slept longer in an uncomfortable airplane seat than I had in the uncomfortable hotel bed in Taiwan. The flight landed with no incident and we sailed through customs without being shaken down (I didn't even declare the $10,000 cash I had on me - ok, so it was $10,000 Taiwan which is about $350 American).
A short delay for our plane home and we arrived safely. All of our bags made it and none of the gifts were destroyed. I was most worried about the paintings and calligraphy, but my masterful packing had preserved them. I can't wait to go again (although if I can avoid the back to back 10,000 calorie days I'll be happy).
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Taiwan Day 4: Tainan
After a somewhat restful night of sleep, I woke up at 3am mostly refreshed. As usual, I found something to occupy my time until my wife was up and we went down to breakfast by at 7 am. We ate a more normal sized meal, after two days of having food crammed down our throats (OK, I admit we voluntarily did the cramming because the food was good and you just can't get Chinese food like that in the states).
The first place we went in Tainan was Anping Fort. This fort was originally built by the Dutch in the 1600s. Then after a war with the Chinese it was taken over by the Chinese. Later the Japanese cleaned house and built up more of the fort. Finally, the Chinese got the fort back after WWII, and being the good capitalists that they are, turned it into a tourist attraction. It was definitely as good as some of the historical sites I have been to in the US. There were a couple of museums with lots of artifacts that had been excavated. Map placards denoted where each part of the fort was and plenty of posters and maps explaining the history and different uses of the fort. In both Chinese and English. And of course, they had the gift shop which we naturally had to spend some money at.
My friend mentioned to me about the Taiwan lottery for our receipts. Basically, every receipt you get has a lottery number that is part of a drawing every two months. Prizes are up to $2 million (Taiwan). It seems the government found a way to "crack down" on under the table purchases by offering the lottery. All of the registers that print the receipts are connected to the lottery system and so the revenue department knows what your total sales are. People will ask for the receipts so they can have a chance to win. I like this idea, maybe we could adopt it in the states (or at least my state).
My friend mentioned to me about the Taiwan lottery for our receipts. Basically, every receipt you get has a lottery number that is part of a drawing every two months. Prizes are up to $2 million (Taiwan). It seems the government found a way to "crack down" on under the table purchases by offering the lottery. All of the registers that print the receipts are connected to the lottery system and so the revenue department knows what your total sales are. People will ask for the receipts so they can have a chance to win. I like this idea, maybe we could adopt it in the states (or at least my state).
Those were the two main places we went in Tainan and then went back to do some shopping in Kaohsiung before dinner. I had a simple list: some presents for the kids and some paintings/caligraphy for our home. I also wanted to get some of the Chinese New Year door hangings, but since it wasn't near New Year, I figured it would be unlikely to find them. We first went to a department store and found some of the gifts that we needed for the kids. My friend's husband did some haggling in Taiwanese (which I barely understand any of) and got us about 30% off. Haggling is almost a requirement of shopping in Taiwan. They had some paintings, but they were rather pricey and I didn't want them. The best Chinese paintings and calligraphy are found in mom & pop shops.
For dinner, my wife and I treated my friend and her husband to Ruth's Chris Steakhouse. We hadn't been to one before and never lived in a city with one, so why not have an American steak halfway around the world. It was just as expensive in Taiwan as in the states, their portions are just as big, so my wife and I split a meal, and my friend and her husband split a meal. The food was great. We had an 8 oz filet minion and they had some other kind of steak. We ordered julienne potatoes but got french fries. I guess french fries are sort of like julienne potatoes. For desert we had the chocolate cake and they had the cheesecake. What we noticed is that everyone else in the restaurant was also splitting meals. (At $75 for the full meal - appetizer, steak, side, salad, and desert - it makes sense to split it.)
In the middle of the meal we had a surprise. My friend's parent's showed up with a Chinese painting to give us (from their home) and a set of New Year's door hangings. The door hangings were done by a famous artist and had his stamp on them. My friend told me that these were very valuable and I should hang them on the outside of the home where they would be weathered and ruined. I assured her that I wouldn't. I offered to pay her father for the paintings, and I gladly would have, but he refused. He wanted them to be a gift for us. Of all the things we brought back from Taiwan, I will probably treasure these gifts the most.
Since we had a flight at 8:30am, we said our goodbye's back at the hotel. We stayed up and packed our stuff until around 11pm.
In the middle of the meal we had a surprise. My friend's parent's showed up with a Chinese painting to give us (from their home) and a set of New Year's door hangings. The door hangings were done by a famous artist and had his stamp on them. My friend told me that these were very valuable and I should hang them on the outside of the home where they would be weathered and ruined. I assured her that I wouldn't. I offered to pay her father for the paintings, and I gladly would have, but he refused. He wanted them to be a gift for us. Of all the things we brought back from Taiwan, I will probably treasure these gifts the most.
Since we had a flight at 8:30am, we said our goodbye's back at the hotel. We stayed up and packed our stuff until around 11pm.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Taiwan Day 3: Kending National Park
Another night of little sleep (although progressively more than before, I think I had about 4 hours), and I was awake at some other awful hour of the morning when I should have been asleep. My wife woke up with a bit of a headache so on the way down to breakfast we asked the Hotel front desk where we might buy some medicine. Immediately they asked if we needed to go to the hospital, no, just medicine.
Breakfast was great again, although I tried to hold back since I was still full from the day before. At 7 am we were down in the lobby to wait for the tour bus. We told my friend about stopping by a pharmacy to pick up some Tylenol (she had lived in Canada so she knew the brand name). Naturally, they don't have Tylenol in Taiwan. So, if you are going overseas, make sure you know the medical name of the most common drugs you may want. For Tylenol it is acetiminaphen. The tour bus stopped by the pharmacy around the corner and we found the Taiwan version of Tylenol: Panadol (made by GlaxoSmithKline - actually the British version which is sold throughout the world). For those who think we pay an arm and a leg for drugs in the US, imagine this. I can pick up a knock off brand of Tylenol, in a 100 count bottle for about $5 in any city in America with a population of more than 5000 (and the name brand is still less than $10). The pharmacy we went to in this city of 1.5 million only had a 10 pack and it was about $5. Even taking into account economies of scale, that is expensive for an over the counter drug.
After the brief stop we were on our way to Kending National Park. We watched the Disney movie "Old Dogs" on the way down. The Taiwanese and Hong Kong people's impression of it: "Do Americans really take so many pills?" Convincing them that only old people do was a little more difficult since we had stopped at the pharmacy to get pills for my wife.
Taiwan was a little late in getting the National Park thing started. Of course when your country is being ruled or invaded by outsiders and then you are ruled by a military dictatorship for several decades while your standard of living changes from a third world nation to an industrial nation, that can put a damper on the recreational areas. The lower southeastern portion of Taiwan is part of Kending National Park, but it is really a conglomeration of parks with roads, towns, cemeteries, and even nuclear power plants in between. The other major difference with Taiwan national parks and the US national parks is safety. Go to the Grand Canyon and you have to physically climb over a fence to take a dive down the rock face. Kending, just step off of the rock cliffs or hop off the rock staircase and you get to plummet to the rocky crags below.
That being said, the views were absolutely beautiful. The second place that we went was a junky looking parking lot with a bath opening up into the forest. We were told there was a beach down that path. Sure enough, 100 yards down the winding path and the forest opens up to a beautiful beach with the prettiest blue water I have ever seen. It made the beaches we went to in California look like rejects. In spite of being at the beach, there weren't many people in swimsuits, lots of people went into the water in just their clothes. There were a couple of models on a photoshoot and they were the only ones wearing bikinis. The guys in our group (from Hong Kong) were excited to "see some skin" and had their girlfriends position themselves so that they could take photos of the models without being too obtrusive. My wife thought it was funny and took a photo of the guys taking photos of the bikini girls. We told them to come and visit us in the states and every beach in the nation would be full of girls in bikinis.
For lunch we went to a seafood restaurant and was served (guess what?) a 10 course meal. Once again we stuffed ourselves. In the afternoon it was a couple of more scenic parks and then down one of the market streets in a town (complete with three 7-11's, a KFC, and McDonalds). Lots of pictures were taken because we probably won't have a chance to go back there (besides there are lots of other things we have yet to see from Taiwan if we do).
The bus ride back to Kaohsiung began with some Karaoke (Mandarin and English). Then someone put the movie "Taken" into the DVD player. In case you haven't seen it, I am not sure what the plot is (more than likely something completely implausible), but the purpose was definitely to show Liam Neeson kicking the crap out of as many people as possible. I am sure he had some lines in the movie, but primarily I just remember him beating people up in so many different ways it was mind boggling. If you want a movie that has a coherent, memorable plot, scratch "Taken" off of your list. If you are just in the mood for non stop violent hand-to-hand combat, "Taken" is definitely one you should watch. (Oh yeah, and there was a Britney Spearsesque character, but I am not sure why she was in there).
Back at the hotel, my wife laid down for a nap, and I went window shopping. There was a mall in the lower floors of the hotel and I wanted to check out some prices on jewelry (pearls and jade) to help my wife figure out what she wanted. In one of the department stores, I spoke with a saleswoman extensively about the coral jewelry. That is what I really wanted to get my wife, a coral necklace. Unfortunately, the price tag on those was anywhere from $1000 (American) to $6000. Since I haven't been able to convince her on the utility of spending $4K-$6K on a Barrett 50 BMG, I can't see how she would strangle me for buying a $6K piece of jewelry. "But they had to kill some coral reef to make it, it is the ultimate symbol of man's dominance over nature!"
After looking for a while, I went walking about town. The streets were filled with small restaurants, 7-11s, and then other shops interspersed. I enjoyed walking around for an hour just seeing the area. One thing I did find was a laundromat right around the corner from the hotel. We could have washed our clothes there rather than the bathtub the the night before. Back at the hotel, my wife woke up and we ordered some dumplings and fruit from room service. I fell asleep by about 9pm (by this time I had gone 140 hours with maybe 16 hours of sleep interspersed). Suprisingly, I slept for around 6 hours.
Breakfast was great again, although I tried to hold back since I was still full from the day before. At 7 am we were down in the lobby to wait for the tour bus. We told my friend about stopping by a pharmacy to pick up some Tylenol (she had lived in Canada so she knew the brand name). Naturally, they don't have Tylenol in Taiwan. So, if you are going overseas, make sure you know the medical name of the most common drugs you may want. For Tylenol it is acetiminaphen. The tour bus stopped by the pharmacy around the corner and we found the Taiwan version of Tylenol: Panadol (made by GlaxoSmithKline - actually the British version which is sold throughout the world). For those who think we pay an arm and a leg for drugs in the US, imagine this. I can pick up a knock off brand of Tylenol, in a 100 count bottle for about $5 in any city in America with a population of more than 5000 (and the name brand is still less than $10). The pharmacy we went to in this city of 1.5 million only had a 10 pack and it was about $5. Even taking into account economies of scale, that is expensive for an over the counter drug.
After the brief stop we were on our way to Kending National Park. We watched the Disney movie "Old Dogs" on the way down. The Taiwanese and Hong Kong people's impression of it: "Do Americans really take so many pills?" Convincing them that only old people do was a little more difficult since we had stopped at the pharmacy to get pills for my wife.
Taiwan was a little late in getting the National Park thing started. Of course when your country is being ruled or invaded by outsiders and then you are ruled by a military dictatorship for several decades while your standard of living changes from a third world nation to an industrial nation, that can put a damper on the recreational areas. The lower southeastern portion of Taiwan is part of Kending National Park, but it is really a conglomeration of parks with roads, towns, cemeteries, and even nuclear power plants in between. The other major difference with Taiwan national parks and the US national parks is safety. Go to the Grand Canyon and you have to physically climb over a fence to take a dive down the rock face. Kending, just step off of the rock cliffs or hop off the rock staircase and you get to plummet to the rocky crags below.
That being said, the views were absolutely beautiful. The second place that we went was a junky looking parking lot with a bath opening up into the forest. We were told there was a beach down that path. Sure enough, 100 yards down the winding path and the forest opens up to a beautiful beach with the prettiest blue water I have ever seen. It made the beaches we went to in California look like rejects. In spite of being at the beach, there weren't many people in swimsuits, lots of people went into the water in just their clothes. There were a couple of models on a photoshoot and they were the only ones wearing bikinis. The guys in our group (from Hong Kong) were excited to "see some skin" and had their girlfriends position themselves so that they could take photos of the models without being too obtrusive. My wife thought it was funny and took a photo of the guys taking photos of the bikini girls. We told them to come and visit us in the states and every beach in the nation would be full of girls in bikinis.
For lunch we went to a seafood restaurant and was served (guess what?) a 10 course meal. Once again we stuffed ourselves. In the afternoon it was a couple of more scenic parks and then down one of the market streets in a town (complete with three 7-11's, a KFC, and McDonalds). Lots of pictures were taken because we probably won't have a chance to go back there (besides there are lots of other things we have yet to see from Taiwan if we do).
The bus ride back to Kaohsiung began with some Karaoke (Mandarin and English). Then someone put the movie "Taken" into the DVD player. In case you haven't seen it, I am not sure what the plot is (more than likely something completely implausible), but the purpose was definitely to show Liam Neeson kicking the crap out of as many people as possible. I am sure he had some lines in the movie, but primarily I just remember him beating people up in so many different ways it was mind boggling. If you want a movie that has a coherent, memorable plot, scratch "Taken" off of your list. If you are just in the mood for non stop violent hand-to-hand combat, "Taken" is definitely one you should watch. (Oh yeah, and there was a Britney Spearsesque character, but I am not sure why she was in there).
Back at the hotel, my wife laid down for a nap, and I went window shopping. There was a mall in the lower floors of the hotel and I wanted to check out some prices on jewelry (pearls and jade) to help my wife figure out what she wanted. In one of the department stores, I spoke with a saleswoman extensively about the coral jewelry. That is what I really wanted to get my wife, a coral necklace. Unfortunately, the price tag on those was anywhere from $1000 (American) to $6000. Since I haven't been able to convince her on the utility of spending $4K-$6K on a Barrett 50 BMG, I can't see how she would strangle me for buying a $6K piece of jewelry. "But they had to kill some coral reef to make it, it is the ultimate symbol of man's dominance over nature!"
After looking for a while, I went walking about town. The streets were filled with small restaurants, 7-11s, and then other shops interspersed. I enjoyed walking around for an hour just seeing the area. One thing I did find was a laundromat right around the corner from the hotel. We could have washed our clothes there rather than the bathtub the the night before. Back at the hotel, my wife woke up and we ordered some dumplings and fruit from room service. I fell asleep by about 9pm (by this time I had gone 140 hours with maybe 16 hours of sleep interspersed). Suprisingly, I slept for around 6 hours.
Taiwan Day 2: The Wedding
Well, after waking up bright and early (around 2 am), I watched a movie on the portable DVD player and waited for the sun to come up. Suprisingly it did at around 5AM. I was a little confused, until I realized that there is no Daylight Savings Time in Taiwan. That is purely a US energy saving scheme that failed to work once air conditioning became widespread (the energy savings on not having lights on for the extra hour is far outweighed by the energy consumed to keep the house cool during the hour that people are awake and it is roasting outside - but I digress, that is a blog for another day about 18th century ideas that were never updated for technology, sort of like mailing out census forms in 2010!).
My wife was awake about this time so we had plenty of time to shower and get cleaned up in time for breakfast. Now, the day before we had had breakfast at a little fast food place in the train station. At the hotel, the breakfast buffet was complimentary. In every hotel I have ever stayed out in America, England, and India that had a complimentary breakfast, the breakfast was mediocre in the States, odd in India, and a decent sized platter in England. But still nothing that I would write home to Mom about (although blood pudding in England is something to taste at least once, no more than once, but at least once).
The breakfast buffet was on the 41st floor so we still had a great view of the ocean and the shipping docks. And the buffet was probably enough to rival most casinos in Las Vegas (never been there but going next year so I can make a true comparison). It was a very interesting blend of western and asian dishes. Pancakes beside Kimchee. Cold cereal and congee. Even a garden salad if that was your fancy for breakfast. There was ham, sausage, bacon, eggs in 20 different varieties, and omelets. Along with this was noodles, chow mein, seaweed, and rice. A couple of soups. Some lunchmeat, cheese, and crackers. Milk, soymilk, orange juice, apple juice, coffee, tea, even hot chocolate. And the bread table was well represented by countries of the world: baguettes, irish soda bread, bread pudding, croissants, sour dough, italian rolls, plus plain white and wheat bread. And Fresh fruit.
This buffet was so big (and all you can eat) that you could stay there for a month and probably not have sampled everything. I and my wife had a good mix of western and asian foods. The one thing we didn't try was the oatmeal, it was way too runny. If we had have known what was ahead of us for the day, we probably would have skipped breakfast. As it was, we both pigged out.
My friend and her maid of honor picked my wife and I up at 8am to take us to her house for parts of the wedding tradition. There was no ceremony like we would envision in the US. Getting married was a matter of signing the correct legal papers and then doing whatever traditions you wanted. My friend's family was from China (coming over with the Nationalists in the late 40's) while her husband's family was Taiwanese (having immigrated from southern China a hundred or so years before). So in traveling to her house she told us all about the different traditions that we would see.
First, before the wedding the wedding pictures were taken. My friend had 5 or 6 dresses for her pictures. Wedding pictures in Chinese culture are a major affair that have the goal of making the bride look like a supermodel. And they do. In fact, I have never seen Chinese wedding pictures (even from poor people) that didn't look like supermodels. In one case, my wife came up to me and saw some pictures on the computer from one of my friends from facebook. She probably initially thought that I was surfing the Glamour or Style or Cosmo website until I explained it to her.
My friend was bejeweled by her mother and aunt to make it look like the family had lots of money. Then my friend asked an important question of my wife. "How do you go to the bathroom in your wedding gown?" She explained that you have others lift up the dress and look away to do your business. My friend decided to fore go the bathroom and just hold it until the afternoon. Since she didn't get to eat much that was probably fine.
The groom arrived a little later in a caravan of expensive cars (not necessarily owned by the groom or his family but in most cases borrowed from whoever has them), to make it look like his family had lots of money. Firecrackers were ignited as the groom exited the car. He started by touching a couple of oranges for good luck. Then coming into the home he had to go to the backroom to retrieve his "shy" bride. In the front room the bride's father and mother were seated and the rest of the family stood around while the groom's family was served a soup by the bride's family (soup plays a role in everything in China, while teaching one Chinese family about Thanksgiving in Canada, they asked what kind of soup we had with our turkey and stuffing - we don't - they made some anyway and that is the only Thanksgiving that I have had soup at).
After eating the soup, the bride and groom bowed three times before the bride's mother and father to thank them for raising her. And then the bride and groom exited the house to go to their new home together. The bride had an aunt holding a shade over the bride so that she wouldn't get any sun on her. In the west, we strive to get that golden brown for special occasions, in Taiwan (and China) they strive to get white (they even have whitening cream from Nutragena - no I am not making that up, my friend gave us a packet of it). After leaving the house, the bride drops a fan which is picked up by the bride's family to give them something to remember their daughter.
The entourage then rides to the bride and groom's new home. We got to ride in the Lexus SUV about 4 back from the lead car. All along the way, the lead car would periodically drop strings of firecrackers out the window, having them go off in the street. And this was on the busy streets. There were a couple of motorscooter riders that got a shock when the firecrackers started popping directly in front (or underneath) them. I kind of wish we did more of this in the US. It might help keep some driver's on their toes (and off their cell phones) if at any moment a string of blackcats could land on your hood and start popping off).
One of the traditions is that the couple's vehicle can not go in reverse while they are in it. This would portend a marriage that is going backwards. Because of this a lot of planning goes into getting cars positioned correctly before the bride and groom get in, scoping out the route beforehand for any construction that may detour the entourage. Of course, some things you can't plan for. At the couple's new apartment building, their car was suppose to drive up to the front door to let them out. Unfortunately the driver waited just a moment to long to do the turn and wound up half in the driveway - half in the street, and the front passenger corner a few inches from having the paint ground off by the concrete planter box. Big dilemma, the car can't go backwards, and they aren't at the front door. I suggested that the guests lift the vehicle up and move it. After about 15-20 minutes of waiting and consulting the elders (those that actually knew and cared about the traditions) someone declared that the entrance to the apartment building was right where the car had stopped, so they got out and went up to their apartment.
In their apartment, more traditions ensued. The bride and groom entered their bedroom and invited everyone in. The groom then jumped on the bed in hopes of having a male child. One of the family members then fed a gelatinous rice ball (sort of like large tapioca) to the bride and groom and they then swapped the balls while kissing. Yes, it doesn't leave anything to the imagination if you know that the 3/4" ball from the bride's mouth ended up in the groom's mouth and vice versa. My friend who was very proper and demure was embarassed beyond belief. The bride then sat by the window and looked pretty while everyone else (including my wife and I) took pictures with her, touched her for good luck, and ate our rice ball soup.
At precisely 10:30 (probably another good luck omen), we left for the hotel to prepare for the reception. I put the finishing touches on my speech and then we went down to the bride's preparation room. She was getting her hair and make up finalized and chatting with friends. She had not eaten much all morning (except the aforementioned rice ball), so I convinced her maid of honor to feed her a large dumpling all at once, rather than cutting it up. She ate it in a very undignified manner, but her parents weren't there to scold her. My wife and I then headed down to the wedding/reception/extravaganza.
I have been to several weddings in my life. Some were small, family affairs. Some were larger. I have never been to one with a sit down catered meal before, although I have seen them portrayed on TV and in the movies. Let me just say that the size and scope of this wedding (for a couple who came from rather average backgrounds) far exceeded the extravagance depicted in something like "Father of the Bride." The ballroom was the size of three basketball courts and jam packed with tables. There were literally 500+ people in attendance. The grooms family and friends on one side and the bride's on the other. Outside there was the greeting tables for the bride and groom where you dropped off your red envelope of lucky money for the couple (we had previously given them their "American" dishes earlier since wrapped presents are usually not given. Looking at the stacks of envelopes on the tables, I estimated there was probably in the neighborhood of $20K to $30K American (about $600K to $900K Taiwan) in cash.
The ballroom was a cacophony of noise, we couldn't find our table and eventually located the bride's father and asked him where we were suppose to sit. He sat us at a table with some relatives including the bride's uncle who was from England. He told us not to get too comfortable because he had been moved three times already. Eventually the program started and the bride and groom entered with much fanfare. There were Chinese dancers, flashing lights, rock music. I am guessing that the fireworks didn't go off because the hotel probably didn't want the liability. Up on the stage the bride and groom went through a cake cutting ceremony (although, we never ate any cake), and then filled a champagne fountain, and then the speakers started. During the first one, I realized that of the 500 people in attendance, probably 4 were actually paying any attention to the speaker. I quickly made some adjustments to my speech in my head to shorten it down from 10 minutes with audience participation to about 3 minutes with no audience participation.
Eating is a very social event in Chinese culture. As such, they don't get hung up on talking with your mouthful, reaching across the table, etc like we do in America. Also, it meant that there was a constant hum of conversation going on such that you could not hear the whisper of the person next to you. We had a great time. The dishes came out were wonderful. Twelve dishes to be precise (my wife and I were stuffed after the first three, but the food kept coming). Lobster Salad, Shark Fin Soup, Fruit platters, pastries, rice, noodles, etc. I have never eaten for three hours before (even at Thanksgiving). There was eating for three hours.
After all of the speakers were done, one of the people sitting at our table went up to the stage to sing. She sang songs in Mandarin, Cantonese, and English (and maybe Taiwanese as well). Very talented. The bride changed gowns to get in her toasting gown. She and the groom then went to each table (50 of them) to toast all of the guests. 50 sips (no matter how small) will probably make you a little tipsy. Near the end, the waiters were packaging up all of the leftover food for take homes (did I mention that there was a LOT of food?). We just took some of the desserts that my wife liked since we were staying at the hotel and probably wouldn't have to eat for the rest of the week. I estimate that I probably consumed 4-5000 calories at that meal (this was after pigging out at breakfast as well).
The bride changed again into her going away gown to thank the guests as they left (yes she wore three dresses that day, which were all different from the dresses she wore for her pictures - including her wedding gown). My wife and I went upstairs to our room, changed into our Kalahsnikitty T-shirts and then took a cab down to the Dream Mall to relax for the afternoon.
The Dream Mall is about twice the size of the Mall of America (in retail floor space) and has about 5 times as many stores. There is an amusement park on top of the mall with the Hello Kitty Ferris Wheel. Our hotel window faced the mall so we were able to see it all lit up at night. The mall was very well laid out with a "theme" for each floor: kids, teens, housewares, food court, furniture, jewelry, etc. We spent a couple of hours there and bought a few things and then made our way back to the hotel.
In the meantime, the main elevator in the hotel had decided to die. So we were able to get up to the 39th floor, but not to the 59th floor where our room was. We waited outside the ballroom we had been at for the wedding which was being set up for another wedding that was about to happen. We joked that if we were hungry we could always try to crash this wedding. We could have climbed the stairs, but our legs were already tired from walking around the mall. Besides, how long can a 85 story building last without an elevator. After about an hour, we were able to go up a service elevator.
Later that evening, my friend, her husband, some of her friends from college and us went to a guitar bar. There was a "famous" musician playing (and taking requests) in English, Taiwanese, and Mandarin. A smorgasbord of food was ordered, which made me wonder how Chinese people could eat so much in such a short amount of time and still be skinny as a rail. (I probably weigh close to twice what my friend weighed and I am not exactly an obese guy - her husband barely weighed more than she did). My wife and I left at around 9pm to go back to the hotel since we had both been surviving on minimal sleep. Didn't get much more that night.
Friday, April 30, 2010
Seatbelt Laws
I heard on the radio that they recently passed a seatbelt law in my state that would require children in the backseat to be buckled up. Normally I don't pay much attention to idiocy like this because if you don't wear a seatbelt in a moving vehicle you are stupid (and as a parent if you don't require your kids to wear seatbelts regardless of where they are seated you are stupid and a bad parent to boot). That being said, when they came up with some statistic, my interest was piqued!
"According to Emergency Room doctors who see this stuff all the time, the leading cause of death for 13-19 year olds is automobile accidents." OK, there is something I can look at (I paraphrased what they said on the radio, it isn't word for word). Deaths from auto accidents is rather easy to determine, and the age range 13-19 is a definite.
My first problem with this is why quote a statistic of 13-19 year olds when the bill is about children wearing seat belts? Most likely because the bill defines anyone under the age of 18 or 21 or like Obamacare, 26 as a child. It helps the numbers more that way. But they are still pretty pathetic.
Over at the CDC is the WISQARS database. If you have read my blogs before, you know that I love it. Pure, unadulterated (for the most part) raw data for years on end. So I pulled up the leading cause of death for the year 2006. Suprisingly, motor vehicle accidents are the leading cause of death for people aged 13-19. Actually, they are the leading cause of death for people aged 1 to 34. Naturally, most people cringe at calling a 34 year old a child, so I can understand why they didn't include that end of it, but why not include the 1-12 year olds when quoting your statistic?
Because the numbers look better. Up to and including age 14 (which is below the legal driving age for almost everyplace in the US) there are around 1700 traffic fatalities a year. For 15-19 year olds there are about 4800. 20-34 year olds account for 14,000 traffic deaths, but the law thinks they are more responsible (sometimes), so we don't want to require them to wear seat belts.
Oh drats, I realized something, I was looking at the nation as a whole. Let me look at just Iowa. Turns out, motor vehicle accidents are the primary cause of death in 13-19 year olds (actually 15-19 year olds, but the numbers for 13 an 14 year olds are so small, that you can add them in and not change the numbers). That being said, from the ages of 0-19 there are about 55 traffic deaths (45 of which are in the 15-19 year bracket) each year in Iowa. I know that the death of a child is horrible, but is it worth having another unenforceable law?
Except it gets worse. WISQARS also breaks it out by cause (motorcycle, driver, passenger, pedestrian, etc.) Looking at these numbers of the 55 traffic deaths, only 14 are classified as car/truck passengers. Of course if we took out the deaths where a car was involved in a collision with a bus/truck (much larger vehicle), then the number decreases down to 8. Unfortunately, WISQARS doesn't say whether they were wearing their seatbelts or not, but I'll assume that 25% were.
So we have a law that is trying to pinpoint 6 deaths. Five of those deaths involve parents who are too stupid to buckle their kids up already, one is probably from a teenager riding with his friends and trying to show he is cool by not wearing a seatbelt. And a law is suppose to solve this? I doubt it.
The National Traffic Safety Board does an annual survey on seatbelt use. Iowa is at 91%. New Hampshire (which has no seatbelt enforcement laws) is at 69%. Comparing non-enforcement states to enforcement states as a whole, and you find that about 75-80% of people are not stupid (i.e. wear their seatbelts regardless of the law). In a nutshell, you shouldn't have to be told to wear a seatbelt. Of course, if you decide not to (or consequently decide not to wear a helmet while riding a motorcycle) then don't come to me for money when your brain is plastered over the road.
"According to Emergency Room doctors who see this stuff all the time, the leading cause of death for 13-19 year olds is automobile accidents." OK, there is something I can look at (I paraphrased what they said on the radio, it isn't word for word). Deaths from auto accidents is rather easy to determine, and the age range 13-19 is a definite.
My first problem with this is why quote a statistic of 13-19 year olds when the bill is about children wearing seat belts? Most likely because the bill defines anyone under the age of 18 or 21 or like Obamacare, 26 as a child. It helps the numbers more that way. But they are still pretty pathetic.
Over at the CDC is the WISQARS database. If you have read my blogs before, you know that I love it. Pure, unadulterated (for the most part) raw data for years on end. So I pulled up the leading cause of death for the year 2006. Suprisingly, motor vehicle accidents are the leading cause of death for people aged 13-19. Actually, they are the leading cause of death for people aged 1 to 34. Naturally, most people cringe at calling a 34 year old a child, so I can understand why they didn't include that end of it, but why not include the 1-12 year olds when quoting your statistic?
Because the numbers look better. Up to and including age 14 (which is below the legal driving age for almost everyplace in the US) there are around 1700 traffic fatalities a year. For 15-19 year olds there are about 4800. 20-34 year olds account for 14,000 traffic deaths, but the law thinks they are more responsible (sometimes), so we don't want to require them to wear seat belts.
Oh drats, I realized something, I was looking at the nation as a whole. Let me look at just Iowa. Turns out, motor vehicle accidents are the primary cause of death in 13-19 year olds (actually 15-19 year olds, but the numbers for 13 an 14 year olds are so small, that you can add them in and not change the numbers). That being said, from the ages of 0-19 there are about 55 traffic deaths (45 of which are in the 15-19 year bracket) each year in Iowa. I know that the death of a child is horrible, but is it worth having another unenforceable law?
Except it gets worse. WISQARS also breaks it out by cause (motorcycle, driver, passenger, pedestrian, etc.) Looking at these numbers of the 55 traffic deaths, only 14 are classified as car/truck passengers. Of course if we took out the deaths where a car was involved in a collision with a bus/truck (much larger vehicle), then the number decreases down to 8. Unfortunately, WISQARS doesn't say whether they were wearing their seatbelts or not, but I'll assume that 25% were.
So we have a law that is trying to pinpoint 6 deaths. Five of those deaths involve parents who are too stupid to buckle their kids up already, one is probably from a teenager riding with his friends and trying to show he is cool by not wearing a seatbelt. And a law is suppose to solve this? I doubt it.
The National Traffic Safety Board does an annual survey on seatbelt use. Iowa is at 91%. New Hampshire (which has no seatbelt enforcement laws) is at 69%. Comparing non-enforcement states to enforcement states as a whole, and you find that about 75-80% of people are not stupid (i.e. wear their seatbelts regardless of the law). In a nutshell, you shouldn't have to be told to wear a seatbelt. Of course, if you decide not to (or consequently decide not to wear a helmet while riding a motorcycle) then don't come to me for money when your brain is plastered over the road.
Taiwan Day 1: Taipei
After getting to bed at around 11:30, I promptly woke up at 2 or 3 in the morning and could not get back to sleep. My wife was awake by 4 am. If I had have know this then I wouldn't have ordered tickets for the high speed rail at 7am. I would have ordered them for the first train at 6 am.
We started the morning with our first cab ride to the train station. $6 and it was a nice pleasant ride (no one is awake at 6 am). At the train station we picked up our tickets and then found something to eat. I think both my wife and I were determined not to eat at any “American” restaurants until the end of our trip. We picked MOS Burger. This is where I run into my first problem. I speak Chinese decently. I can even read about 1200 of the most common characters which gives me about a 60% comprehension of a newspaper. Unfortunately, menus are primarily made up of food terms which a lot of are among the next 1800 common words. So we ordered based on the pictures.
The high speed rail system in Taiwan is privately owned, privately operated train system that runs the length of the island. The trains travel up to 360 km/hr, although while we were riding it I never saw them post a speed above 295 km/hr (they post the current speed on the message board). To me though, the high speed rail is a trophy for capitalism. My friend had told me that two weeks before, an earthquake had struck Kaohsiung and the high speed rail was shut down for a week because of track damage. One week! Had this been a government operations, it would have been shut down for 6 months, the maximum speed reduced to 150 km/hr for “safety,” and the price of tickets would double. However, being a private corporation, they had every incentive (read profits) to get it back up and running (at normal speeds) as quickly as possible.
The hour and a half journey was a great view of the Taiwan countryside. Rice fields, fruit groves, interspersed among the temples, factories, and homes. We saw plains, hills, mountains, and forests all within the short trip. At Taipei, it was time to figure out how to ride the subway station. We could have just taken a cab, but that would start to get expensive. Fortunately, the subway was similar to every other subway I have ridden with regards to buying tickets and getting on board the correct line. We even got off at the right stop and walked up to the streets of Taipei.
Our first destination was the LDS Temple in Taipei. It was about a half mile walk down AiGuo Rd. from the subway station. This street is called wedding row in Taipei because the street is literally lined with wedding shops. We were later to learn that a wedding party/reception/extravaganza was a far bigger event than we had ever imagined. After wedding row, the street turned into small mom and pop fast food shops. Also, the motorscooters were out in force.
Motorscooters are the major mode of transportation in Taiwan. The rules of the road are a lot more flexible. Surprisingly, I never saw an accident (although I saw plenty of evidence of accidents from the scratched taxis and dented car doors). To put it in perspective, in the United States we rely on the rules of the road to keep us safe (most everyone uses their blinkers, the maintain distance and don't go weaving in and around traffic). In Taiwan, you rely on your driving skills and instincts to keep safe. You have to be aware of what a dozen vehicles around you are doing and be prepared to react in an instant as conditions change. Don't think about crossing the street except at the crosswalk when you have a green light, because you don't know what may be coming around the corner.
At the Taipei temple I learned something about clothes. For the worship service we change into all white clothes. I told the lady at the desk my pants size and she looked at me funny. They didn't have that exact size but she suggested something which to me was 5 sizes larger. I opted for the next closest size to what I thought was correct, which was only two sizes larger, I figured I could roll up the legs if I had too. In the dressing room I found out I was wrong. There was no way those pants would fit they were far too short. As I was taking them back to the desk it dawned on me that perhaps they measure the total length of the pants rather than just the inseam. Sure enough, that was the case in Taiwan. So I ended up with a pair of pants that I originally thought would be 6 sizes too long, but turned out to be just right.
Afterwards, we went across the street and ate at one of the Mom & Pop shops. The owner cajoled us with "Foreign Friends, come on eat here!" So we did. For around $2 we had a meal of soup and dumplings (my wife's favorite). We then walked across the street to the Chiang Kai Shek Memorial. Sort of the Lincoln Memorial for Taiwan, except that the size and grandeur of it far outdid every American memorial I have visited.
Next it was time for a subway ride up to the National Palace Museum. While many people would think that Beijing would be the place to go to see ancient Chinese art, they would be wrong. Taipei is the place to go. Back during the Chinese civil war, the Nationalists moved the vast majority of the art from the Palace Museum in Beijing to Taiwan. Probably for good reason since the Communists later purged the country during the cultural revolution. The museum boasts more than 600,000 pieces of which only about 60-70 thousand are on display at one time. The most disappointing part was not being able to take photographs. I understand the ban on photography back when there was only flash photography and preservationists were worried about the effect that the flash would have on old works. But the days of celluloid photography (i.e. film) are over. I can take hundreds of pictures with a digital camera (all without the flash) varying the setting each time until I get the perfect photo. And the effect on the work of art will be no different than if I had have just stood there looking at it.
Anyway, the people watching might actually have been more fun. Since Taiwan has the largest (and best) collection of Chinese art, a lot of mainland Chinese come to see it. Now there are some factors to bear in mind. China has a billion plus people. They have cities that make NY look small, the population density in the cities is extremely high. So people are used to being crowded, bumped into, and pushed out of the way. Additionally, the people from mainland China only have a limited time to visit the museum (talking with some tour groups, about one day) and may never get back to the museum again in their lifetime. Imagine trying to see everything in the Smithsonian in one day.
So, while my wife and I are relative ignoramouses when it comes to Chinese art, we were just there to see it, the people whose ancestors made this art were overbearing in some instances. While we may slowly walk along a display case, reading about each piece shown, a tour group would come up to look at one piece (which probably had a lot of significance to them). They had no problem pushing us out of the way, or just enveloping us (with no chance of excape). After about an hour, we decided what we would look at by going to things where there weren't tour groups.
Its interesting, whenever you see Hollywood depict people in a museum, they show people taking their time and enjoying each work of art. I wonder if Chinese films that depict people in a museum show a cacophony of tour groups running from one exhibit to another, pushing people out of the way for a better look. Pushing people out of the way isn't rude, it is just normal life for them.
After the museum closed at 5:00pm, we took some pictures outside and then walked over to the Silk Palace restaurant next to the museum. They had all you can eat Dim Sum. Dim Sum is a Cantonese cuisine, but I chose it so that my wife could try a multitude of new dishes (her Chinese food sampling in life had been somewhat limited). Then it was a cab ride back to the subway station and a subway ride back to the train station, and we made it to the train with about 10 minutes to spare. I slept on the train all the way back to Kaohsiung (too bad it was only 1 1/2 hours). We were in our hotel by midnight, and went to sleep.
Well, sort of again. The beds in Taiwan are hard, think of it as a board with a 1/4" foam pad on it. So my wife and I were piling pillows under our bodies to try and get a restful sleep. It works OK until you roll over. I was wide awake at 2 am.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Trip to Taiwan
On Tuesday night my wife and I found ourselves staying up all night to get ready for our trip the next day. We wanted to shock our systems into sleeping on Taiwan time, before we arrived. Round about 1am, I actually packed the bags (our flight was at 8am). Since it was an international flight to Asia, we could each take two bags free. As such, I had told my friend in Taiwan to let us know what all she wanted. The bags were chock full of presents and other items for her. I did read the customs rules in Taiwan to make sure that I wasn't bringing in anything illegal (after all, it wouldn't look good for a Mormon to be arrested at the Taiwan airport for bringing in too much alcohol).
I tried to order our high speed rail tickets in Taiwan, but the credit card kept on getting declined. I was about to give up and call my friend over there, when I decided to call the card company and tell them that we would be traveling to Japan and Taiwan. Sure enough, after getting off the phone with them, the sale went through. We were able to get a couple hours sleep before our flight.
As usual, the TSA airport security was a joke. But they figured we weren't terrorists and since we could have two checked bags for free, I didn't have to attempt to use any super secret methods (i.e. cargo pants pocket) to get prohibited items (i.e. 4 ounce bottle of lotion) on board. They didn't have the new millimeter scanners at our local airport or at Chicago.
The plane ride from Chicago was on a 777. I had flown these over to England several times when I worked in a previous job, and so I loved the personal entertainment system. This one had about a dozen movies (which started every half hour or so you didn't have to wait 2 hours to watch a movie from the beginning) and another dozen TV shows. The games were expanded to 15 (when I had flown the 777 before it was only 6) but the response time of the controller was still mind numbingly slow, I really want them to boost their system so that I can play something like Halo on international flights. One disappointment was that there were no power outlets in economy class (some airlines have them), so that meant that our personal entertainment would only last as long as the battery life of the DVD player and the laptop - about 4 hours combined.
So my wife and I started off with a movie "The Proposal" starring Sandra Bullock and Dane Cook. I like Sandra, Jesse James should be shot for cheating on her. The editing on planes sure has declined as the scene where Sandra and Dane are completely naked (with some well placed hands) was included. Yes, Sandra is almost as good looking as my wife. The movie was a humorous romantic comedy and it killed a couple of hours. The most annoying thing though was being interrupted by the various flight announcements. I really wish they would let whoever was flying on a plane for the first time (or wanted a refresher of the safety briefing) to sit up front, and then leave the rest of us alone.
Lunch (or dinner) arrived and I remembered the other reason why I like international flights - they actually feed you! Salad, roast beef, roll, sushi, etc. The tray was full and definitely filled me up. After switching between some things and trying to sleep some (I had only had two hours of sleep in the last 36 hours) I finally settled on another movie "Did you hear about the Morgans?" starring Hugh Grant and Sarah Jessica Parker. I don't really care for either one of them, but the movie was halfway descent for another romantic comedy.
Then my wife and I listened to a book by John Stossel on how everything we know is wrong. That lasted until the battery on the DVD player ran out, about two hours. We got a turkey and cheese sandwich for our next meal when we were over the Bering Sea.
I finally decided to go for another movie and watched "Avatar." Not even making it past the first half hour, I can say it is probably one of the dumbest movies that I have ever not watched completely. I was bored out of my eyes and finally turned it off and got an hour or so of sleep.
In Tokyo (never been there before), the first thing I noticed is that the EXIT signs were green. Turned out they were green in Taiwan as well. I found an ATM machine and pulled out 10,000 yen. The card worked. Then looking through the shops, I found what I thought was apple juice. I was correct, although it was probably made from a different kind of apple than what we turn into apple juice in the USA.
For the final leg of our journey, we boarded a Japan Airlines flight. The flight attendants were all 20 something and beautiful. Turns out, in Asia, flight attendants are the de facto sex symbol (as my friend described it, sort of like the UPS men in the US). As such, they are all 20 something, all beautiful, and most of them speak 2 or 3 or more languages.
Another great airline meal, pork cutlets with Miso sauce, shrimp tempura, salad, apple jello. Of course the entertainment selection was lacking (but I really just wanted to sleep at this point although was unable to). I have noticed this on other foreign airlines I have flown (Lufthansa and India Air). Maybe us Americans are just picky about being entertained.
Finally, we arrived in Taiwan. No problem with customs, all of our luggage made it. And the wedding gifts didn't get broken (basically about half of our luggage was wedding gifts). One snag though. When I tried to use the ATM machine at the airport, it didn't give me any money. I'll have to call the bank again (it worked in Tokyo). Our hotel room is nice, on the 59th floor. After a shower, my wife laid down and probably got three hours of sleep or more (she just woke up). Me on the other hand, I tossed for about two hours and got up to blog. So I am running on maybe 5 hours of sleep in the last 60 hours. I probably won't have a chance again until tonight. Jet lag is SOOOOOO much fun!
I tried to order our high speed rail tickets in Taiwan, but the credit card kept on getting declined. I was about to give up and call my friend over there, when I decided to call the card company and tell them that we would be traveling to Japan and Taiwan. Sure enough, after getting off the phone with them, the sale went through. We were able to get a couple hours sleep before our flight.
As usual, the TSA airport security was a joke. But they figured we weren't terrorists and since we could have two checked bags for free, I didn't have to attempt to use any super secret methods (i.e. cargo pants pocket) to get prohibited items (i.e. 4 ounce bottle of lotion) on board. They didn't have the new millimeter scanners at our local airport or at Chicago.
The plane ride from Chicago was on a 777. I had flown these over to England several times when I worked in a previous job, and so I loved the personal entertainment system. This one had about a dozen movies (which started every half hour or so you didn't have to wait 2 hours to watch a movie from the beginning) and another dozen TV shows. The games were expanded to 15 (when I had flown the 777 before it was only 6) but the response time of the controller was still mind numbingly slow, I really want them to boost their system so that I can play something like Halo on international flights. One disappointment was that there were no power outlets in economy class (some airlines have them), so that meant that our personal entertainment would only last as long as the battery life of the DVD player and the laptop - about 4 hours combined.
So my wife and I started off with a movie "The Proposal" starring Sandra Bullock and Dane Cook. I like Sandra, Jesse James should be shot for cheating on her. The editing on planes sure has declined as the scene where Sandra and Dane are completely naked (with some well placed hands) was included. Yes, Sandra is almost as good looking as my wife. The movie was a humorous romantic comedy and it killed a couple of hours. The most annoying thing though was being interrupted by the various flight announcements. I really wish they would let whoever was flying on a plane for the first time (or wanted a refresher of the safety briefing) to sit up front, and then leave the rest of us alone.
Lunch (or dinner) arrived and I remembered the other reason why I like international flights - they actually feed you! Salad, roast beef, roll, sushi, etc. The tray was full and definitely filled me up. After switching between some things and trying to sleep some (I had only had two hours of sleep in the last 36 hours) I finally settled on another movie "Did you hear about the Morgans?" starring Hugh Grant and Sarah Jessica Parker. I don't really care for either one of them, but the movie was halfway descent for another romantic comedy.
Then my wife and I listened to a book by John Stossel on how everything we know is wrong. That lasted until the battery on the DVD player ran out, about two hours. We got a turkey and cheese sandwich for our next meal when we were over the Bering Sea.
I finally decided to go for another movie and watched "Avatar." Not even making it past the first half hour, I can say it is probably one of the dumbest movies that I have ever not watched completely. I was bored out of my eyes and finally turned it off and got an hour or so of sleep.
In Tokyo (never been there before), the first thing I noticed is that the EXIT signs were green. Turned out they were green in Taiwan as well. I found an ATM machine and pulled out 10,000 yen. The card worked. Then looking through the shops, I found what I thought was apple juice. I was correct, although it was probably made from a different kind of apple than what we turn into apple juice in the USA.
For the final leg of our journey, we boarded a Japan Airlines flight. The flight attendants were all 20 something and beautiful. Turns out, in Asia, flight attendants are the de facto sex symbol (as my friend described it, sort of like the UPS men in the US). As such, they are all 20 something, all beautiful, and most of them speak 2 or 3 or more languages.
Another great airline meal, pork cutlets with Miso sauce, shrimp tempura, salad, apple jello. Of course the entertainment selection was lacking (but I really just wanted to sleep at this point although was unable to). I have noticed this on other foreign airlines I have flown (Lufthansa and India Air). Maybe us Americans are just picky about being entertained.
Finally, we arrived in Taiwan. No problem with customs, all of our luggage made it. And the wedding gifts didn't get broken (basically about half of our luggage was wedding gifts). One snag though. When I tried to use the ATM machine at the airport, it didn't give me any money. I'll have to call the bank again (it worked in Tokyo). Our hotel room is nice, on the 59th floor. After a shower, my wife laid down and probably got three hours of sleep or more (she just woke up). Me on the other hand, I tossed for about two hours and got up to blog. So I am running on maybe 5 hours of sleep in the last 60 hours. I probably won't have a chance again until tonight. Jet lag is SOOOOOO much fun!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Start 'Em Young
Yesterday, my daughter helped me with the mail. When she got the stack inside she sorted through it and gladly gave me the bills and junk mail. Then she came to the SOG International catalog and promptly told me "Mine."
I tried to snatch it away from her but she was having nothing of it. So after chasing her for a while I asked "Do you even know what that is?"
"Shooting!"
With that, I had to let her have it. Eventually, after she took it apart piece by piece, I was able to to gather it up and put it back together so that I could look at it.
Start 'em young, and maybe you won't have to use that shotgun when she turns 16!
I tried to snatch it away from her but she was having nothing of it. So after chasing her for a while I asked "Do you even know what that is?"
"Shooting!"
With that, I had to let her have it. Eventually, after she took it apart piece by piece, I was able to to gather it up and put it back together so that I could look at it.
Start 'em young, and maybe you won't have to use that shotgun when she turns 16!
Sunday, April 4, 2010
My Household Census Form
Well, based on my last post, I sort of promised that I would put a copy of my census form online. So here it is. I have made an effort to transcribe my comments as best as possible in case you can't read the images. My comments are in italics, the normal text is the question it is in response to.
Page 1. Use blue or black pen. Okay that is black. Whatever happened to the #2 pencil?
Count all people, including babies, who live and sleep here most of the time. What about those who split their time 50/50?
Question 1 Number of people: VI This is in Roman numerals.
Question 2 This is stupid that you are asking since you just spent half of the column explaining who and who not to count.
Question 3 House with mortgage checked. But with the right lottery ticket it will be
Occupied without payment of rent Do people actually answer this?
Question 4 This is my work pager and I haven't replaced the battery in about two years but I probably don't want to talk to whoever calls anyway.
Question 5 Initials should be good enough.
Question 6 Although I do have one X chromosome so if you need to check both, feel free.
Question 7 Age: >30 Birthdate: This is according to the Hebrew Calendar.
Note: Please answer BOTH Question 8 about Hispanic origin and Question 9 about race. For this census, Hispanic origins are not races. That's ok, most of what is under "Race" isn't race either.
Question 9: See also Person #2, American Indian tribe: Don't know, but a G-G-G-G-G Grandmother was Native American. Japanese: Does this include Ainu? Other Asian: Turk, Indian (India kind) Some other race: I'm sure I missed something.
Question 10 Does Person 1 sometimes live or stay somewhere else? Duh!! College: Long time ago, Military: They wouldn't take me, Second Residence: I'd like too, Jail: I hope not, Nursing home: Eventually.
Person 2 Name: Again initials are fine, if not, contact the IRS, they have more info.
Question 2 How is this person related to Person 1? Mark ONE box. What happens if more than one is applicable?
Question 3: We do live in Iowa though!
Question 4: 29ish This date is the Islamic calendar.
Question 6 After coming out of Africa 2 million years ago, my ancestors have been all over the world.
Why are we stuck on Race? There is more space allocated to identify race than all other questions combined?
Question 7 Duh!!
Person 3
Question 4 Persian Calendar
Question 5 and 6 Everything that is in Person #1 and Person #2.
Question 7 Duh!!
Person 4
Question 4 Mayan long count
5, 6, 7 are the same as Person #3
Person 5
Question 4 Indian Civil Calendar
5, 6, 7 are the same as Person #3 and Person #4
Person #6
Question 1 Whoops I messed up.
Question 4 Julian Calendar *
5, 6, 7 are the same as Person #3, Person #4 and Person #5
* It took me a while to realize this but asking age and date of birth is redundant. You only need the date.
You guys really need to get on the internet and allow us to fill out these forms online. The IRS has figured it out and that involves actual money (not the fake "we won't be able to build hospitals without the census" crap that I hear on the commercials). Hopefully, by 2020 you will have this all figured out.
If more people live here, turn the page and continue: I sure hope there aren't anymore living here right now, I can barely keep up with the number. Good thing our family reunion wasn't on April 1st or I might have 10-12 forms to fill out.
To whoever opens this, I hope you get a good laugh. All answers are absolutely truthful. If the information is not in the format you want then include more precise instructions next time. If you want to give up now, just send someone to our house, we can always use a good babysitter. To reiterate the # of people at our home is 六 (Chinese) or ٦ (Arabic) or ς' (Greek) or षष् (Sanskrit).
...take about 10 minutes... I spent 20 minutes but I was always good at creative writing.
Well, that was fun. Good thing it only comes along once every 10 years. Besides, as we have seen on the commercials, the country is going to come to a screeching halt without the census because capitalism doesn't work (you know, that supply and demand thing we keep trying to pretend doesn't exist). Yes, I did actually mail this form in. No, I didn't tape the postage paid envelope to a tire or anything.
Page 1. Use blue or black pen.
Count all people, including babies, who live and sleep here most of the time. What about those who split their time 50/50?
Question 1 Number of people: VI This is in Roman numerals.
Question 2 This is stupid that you are asking since you just spent half of the column explaining who and who not to count.
Question 3 House with mortgage checked. But with the right lottery ticket it will be
Occupied without payment of rent Do people actually answer this?
Question 4 This is my work pager and I haven't replaced the battery in about two years but I probably don't want to talk to whoever calls anyway.
Question 5 Initials should be good enough.
Question 6 Although I do have one X chromosome so if you need to check both, feel free.
Question 7 Age: >30 Birthdate: This is according to the Hebrew Calendar.
Note: Please answer BOTH Question 8 about Hispanic origin and Question 9 about race. For this census, Hispanic origins are not races. That's ok, most of what is under "Race" isn't race either.
Question 9: See also Person #2, American Indian tribe: Don't know, but a G-G-G-G-G Grandmother was Native American. Japanese: Does this include Ainu? Other Asian: Turk, Indian (India kind) Some other race: I'm sure I missed something.
Question 10 Does Person 1 sometimes live or stay somewhere else? Duh!! College: Long time ago, Military: They wouldn't take me, Second Residence: I'd like too, Jail: I hope not, Nursing home: Eventually.
Person 2 Name: Again initials are fine, if not, contact the IRS, they have more info.Question 2 How is this person related to Person 1? Mark ONE box. What happens if more than one is applicable?
Question 3: We do live in Iowa though!
Question 4: 29ish This date is the Islamic calendar.
Question 6 After coming out of Africa 2 million years ago, my ancestors have been all over the world.
Why are we stuck on Race? There is more space allocated to identify race than all other questions combined?
Question 7 Duh!!
Person 3
Question 4 Persian Calendar
Question 5 and 6 Everything that is in Person #1 and Person #2.
Question 7 Duh!!
Person 4
Question 4 Mayan long count
5, 6, 7 are the same as Person #3
Person 5
Question 4 Indian Civil Calendar
5, 6, 7 are the same as Person #3 and Person #4
Person #6
Question 1 Whoops I messed up.
Question 4 Julian Calendar *
5, 6, 7 are the same as Person #3, Person #4 and Person #5
* It took me a while to realize this but asking age and date of birth is redundant. You only need the date.
You guys really need to get on the internet and allow us to fill out these forms online. The IRS has figured it out and that involves actual money (not the fake "we won't be able to build hospitals without the census" crap that I hear on the commercials). Hopefully, by 2020 you will have this all figured out.
If more people live here, turn the page and continue: I sure hope there aren't anymore living here right now, I can barely keep up with the number. Good thing our family reunion wasn't on April 1st or I might have 10-12 forms to fill out.
To whoever opens this, I hope you get a good laugh. All answers are absolutely truthful. If the information is not in the format you want then include more precise instructions next time. If you want to give up now, just send someone to our house, we can always use a good babysitter. To reiterate the # of people at our home is 六 (Chinese) or ٦ (Arabic) or ς' (Greek) or षष् (Sanskrit).
...take about 10 minutes... I spent 20 minutes but I was always good at creative writing.
Well, that was fun. Good thing it only comes along once every 10 years. Besides, as we have seen on the commercials, the country is going to come to a screeching halt without the census because capitalism doesn't work (you know, that supply and demand thing we keep trying to pretend doesn't exist). Yes, I did actually mail this form in. No, I didn't tape the postage paid envelope to a tire or anything.
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